The Second Living Room

How peaceful grounds, good coffee and familiar faces can help create new family traditions.

One of my favourite things about Maple Park Café is not actually inside the café at all. It is the view out of the window.

At this time of year, the grounds around us really do come into their own. After the recent mixture of rain, sunshine, rain, sunshine, and then more rain just to keep us all guessing, everything has gone slightly wild in the best possible way. The grass is greener, the trees are fuller, the flowers seem to have doubled in size overnight, and the whole place has that feeling of being properly alive.

(photo from Gallery - Maple Park Crematorium)

It is, without doubt, my favourite place for a coffee break. Although, as I work in a café, I appreciate that may not be the most shocking confession ever made. The grounds here are more than just a nice backdrop. They matter. They provide calm, comfort and, for many people, a bit of solace at a time when they might really need it. We see that every day.

Some people come in after a service. Some come in before visiting the gardens. Some come just because they have made Maple Park part of their routine. A cup of coffee, a slice of cake, a quiet table, a familiar face. Simple things, but important ones.

A huge amount of credit for the grounds must go to Jay and Pippa from the council crematorium team. They work incredibly hard, not just maintaining the gardens but planning them, shaping them and thinking carefully about how they will develop over time. It is lovely to see people who are clearly passionate about the place they look after. That passion shows.

(the grounds 4 years ago - Gallery - Maple Park Crematorium)

When we first arrived at Maple Park four years ago, people always said lovely things about the grounds, but there was also a common comment that they still needed to “soften”. The planting needed time. The trees needed to mature. The buildings needed to settle into the landscape and weather slightly.

Well, I think we can safely say we are now in the “softened era”.

Everything feels more settled, more established and more welcoming. It is no surprise that we see more visitors around the grounds at this time of year. People do not just pass through. They linger. They sit. They talk. They remember.

The other day, three women sat outside for at least four hours. Four hours. That is either a very good catch-up, a very strong commitment to coffee, or possibly both. But watching them, it was clear that this was part of their family routine. This was not just somewhere to sit. It was somewhere that meant something. That is what good spaces can do.

If you create beautiful, thoughtful, welcoming spaces, people will use them in ways you could never fully plan. New habits form. New rituals appear. New family traditions grow.

As Maple Park Café has grown within the grounds, we have become more and more passionate about this idea. Cafés are not just places to eat and drink. At their best, they become community spaces. They become places where people meet, pause, gather, talk, laugh, cry, remember and reconnect.

That feels especially important now.

Many of the traditional community spaces we once relied on are not as available as they used to be. Pubs are closing at a worrying rate. Village halls are not always accessible or used in the same way they once were. Public houses, in the old sense of the phrase, are disappearing from many communities.

Cafés are increasingly becoming the new “second living room” - a phrase I am borrowing, with full credit, from my fellow speaker at the recent London Coffee Festival, Jayne Cromwell from Carnival Coffee Roasters. It is a brilliant phrase because it captures exactly what so many cafés now provide. Somewhere informal, warm, familiar and human.

This is why I was particularly interested to learn about the two new crematorium developments locally, at Oulton and North York. From what I have seen, they appear to have been designed beautifully, with careful thought given to the buildings and surrounding landscapes. That is good to see.

But I was saddened to understand that catering facilities are not currently part of those plans.

Now, I should be honest here. As a businessman and entrepreneur, naturally my ears pricked up when I first heard about new crematorium developments. I did not exactly leap from behind the coffee machine shouting “opportunity!”, but let’s just say I was interested. However, whether it was Maple Park Café or another local business taking on such a facility, I believe the principle is bigger than one café. A café or wake catering space within crematorium grounds can become much more than a commercial unit. It can become another community hub at a time and place where people sorely need one.

It creates jobs. It creates opportunities for small family businesses.

It gives families somewhere close, convenient and comforting to gather after a service without needing to travel elsewhere. It supports people in moments of grief and remembrance. It allows the site to become not just a building people visit once, but a place families return to.

Of course, new crematorium developments may be public or private, run by companies such as Westerleigh, Dignity, Memoria, the Crematorium and Memorial Group, or others in the sector. Whoever is building them, I would strongly encourage serious consideration of café and wake catering facilities as part of future plans.

Yes, there is an obvious benefit to the operator in terms of rental income. But the wider benefit is much more important.

A good café space can help turn a facility into a community place. It can help people feel less alone. It can give families somewhere to sit together after difficult moments. It can allow small businesses to grow alongside carefully designed public spaces. It can help build relationships. And over time, those relationships become traditions.

At Maple Park, we have seen this happen. We have seen people return again and again. We have seen families make us part of their routine. We have seen how a café, placed within peaceful grounds and supported by a caring community, can become something far more meaningful than a place that sells sandwiches and cake.

Although, for the record, the chocolate brownie does help!

Buildings are important. Gardens are important. Design is important. But what happens in those spaces afterwards is what really matters.

Building buildings can lead to building community.

Building community can lead to building relationships.

And building relationships can lead to new traditions.

That is what we see here at Maple Park. And it is something I hope many more places will have the chance to create in the future.

photo from Gallery - Maple Park Crematorium